July 28th

Today, another visit with Dr. Chiu (邱紹華). Everything seems to be fine except the coughing. It just won't go away. Even though she doesn't cough as much and the tissue wiper consumption is evidently slowing down now whereas just few weeks ago, she used up a whole carton of those fine non-woven tissue easily in a short week. And the bad thing is she has this "ritual" of throwing up everything and less than violent coughing before going to bed every night lately. Dr. Chiu prescribes cough medicine and hope this will take care of it.

We are sent to a dermatologist to check out her feet and hands where fungus infection is evident. Given her current condition, she is susceptible to infection and given lotion and ointment to take care of her skin problem.

She has shed about 10 kgs since coming home. Her hearty appetite slips out of her. At patient's request, we bought a can of protein rich "Ensure" in powder form to fortify her nutrition otherwise she eats rice porridge with minced meat only.

She gets tired easily and her spirit is low. Not in the mood to go out breathing fresh air as of now. She complains I hardly spend time with her...

An Afterthought, Can You Drink the Cup That I Am Going to Drink 事後的聯想

"...Should I not to drink the cup the Father has given me?" John 18:11b
“我父所給我的那杯，我豈可不喝呢？"約十八章十一節


This is the verse of the day from "Streams in the Desert" when I read Eileen while waiting her MRI report from Dr. Hsu Monday morning. My heart skipped, "Wouldn't it be...?" I told her what I thought but stopped there short without saying much. She met my query with silence.
七月十九日（星期一）早晨，在等待許大夫告知核磁共振報告的同時，我與藹玲一起讀“荒漠甘泉”，這是當天的經文。我的心咯噔一下，脫口而出“莫非這是..？” 藹玲轉過頭去，用沈默制止我繼續往下提。


Monday passed in waiting. We even called Dr. Hsu's office, left a message around 6:30 PM and were told he is in the surgery room.
這一天就在等待裡渡過了。傍晚六點半，我們打到許大夫的辦公室，被告知他還在手術室。


I flew to Hong Kong resuming my work next day and nothing happened until about the same time at 6:30 PM, our anxious patient called and asked if I got a call from Dr. Hsu. My day flew by when one buried himself in his work while Eileen waited and waited the whole day. I tried to comfort her by saying Dr. Hsu must be in the surgery room and has have time to call us.
隔天一大早，我飛到香港回公司上班。當一個人埋在事情裡面時，時間在不知不覺中過去了。傍晚六點半，坐立不安了一天的病人忍不住打電話問我是否接到許大夫的電話。我試著安慰她說也許醫生還在手術中，沒有空處理我們的事。


Just about the time, I've done my meeting in Shenzhen and was on my way to cross boarder getting back to Hong Kong, I picked up a familiar voice spoken from my cell phone, it was Dr. Hsu.
在深圳開完會正要過關返港時，手機的另一端傳來了許大夫熟悉的聲音。


"Please, ple-e-e-ease! Dr. Hsu tell me the result, good or bad, please!" I was begging him in my mind and in his characteristic soft and slow speaking tone, Dr. Hsu went "Her RMI image shows there remain scar tissue on the surgical wound about where the tumor was removed. (What does this mean, how bad is the scar tissue, Dr. Hsu? I held my breath and listen on.)
出於急迫，我在心裡不住地催促著他，“是好是壞，拜託，拜託你，快把結果告訴我吧！” 許大夫用他那溫和的聲音慢慢地開講了，“核磁共振影像顯示腦瘤移除的傷口開始結疤。（結疤是好還是壞呢，許大夫？我耐著性子聽下去。）”


"There is no other place that shows sign of alarm."
“大腦其他部位並未發現異常。”


"Would the scar issue have impact about her motor function from here on and how big is the cavity?" I pressed on.
“傷口的疤對於她肢體運動往後會有影響嗎？傷口的空洞有多大？”我追問道。



He answered, "The scare tissue is expected and will stay with her for a long time. It should not have postmortem adverse effect. The cavity left from her surgical wound is rather small when the brain tissue fills up the space after the tumor removal. One should be alarmed only when her four limbs go limping while intermittent numbness should not be too much a concern."
他緩緩地答道，“ 傷口結疤是正常的，而且這個疤可能會一輩子留在那裡，但不會影響她的運動神經。傷口的空洞很小，大部分都被腦組織填上了。間歇性手腳的麻痺應該不會是大問題，若是四肢無力就要格外注意了。”



"Let's keep monitor her progress and check her up in another three months." he continued. 
“繼續觀察她的進展，三個月後再進行一次檢查，”他補充道。


I took it this is a good sign or so far so good and very relieved. I then called our patient-desperate-in-waiting and retold her my conversation with Dr. Hsu. At the end, I asked her to prepare to get up early in the morning, I mean very early when I will bring her out to the wooded park in our area. Her voice came back lively.
這麼聽來是不錯的結果，起碼目前為止是這樣的，我心裡的石頭掉了下來。於是立刻致電給那位等得快要憔悴了的病人，然後一五一十地把我和許大夫的對話轉述給她。末了，我提醒病人每天早早休息，待我回家時，再一大早帶她到林子裡走走，呼吸新鮮空氣。她此時的聲音又活了過來。



It dawned on me the whole way back through Hong Kong riding on a bus, and I turned and tossed in the middle of the night last night until early in the morning that we're simply too feeble a vessel to make into a noble article of His desire and He cuts us some slack with an easier path. How would we handle the situation if the outcome was otherwise when a verse popped up in my mind afresh, "No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it." 1 Corinthians 10:13
坐在公車返港的一路上，甚至回到家裡睡在床上，半夜裡朦朦朧朧直到天明，我長時間不自主地返想，我們實在是很卑微的器皿，以至於神給我們一條出路。若是另外的結果我們又會如何面對，腦子裡就有一段經節跑了出來，“你們所遇見的試探，無非是人所能受的。神是信實的，必不叫你們受試探過於所能受的；在受試探的時候，總要給你們開一條出路，叫你們能忍受得住。”林前十章十三節


We just turned yet another page of our ordeal. What unfolds next we don't know, but are reminded to walk daily with Him.
我們在這件事上又走了一步，下一回如何沒人知道，卻有聲音提醒道要常常來親近神。  

She Is Fine 病人目前還好

Dear All Those Caring Families and Friend

關心我們的親友們

Hospital visit - We left home right after 6:00 early in the morning and didn't make it home after 9:30 PM yesterday. Long day it was and our patient broke in pieces on the way back inside the car, guess the patience's physical strength was way stretched over. Let me not to go there, you don't want to hear the graphic details.

昨天來回醫院花了超過十二個小時的時辰，回家路上病人終於撐不住了，連咳帶吐折騰了一路。

The lesson learned is that we won't see more than one doctor in one visit next time, otherwise the toll of waiting in between on the hard bench was too much for our frail patient not to mention one needs to endure the merciless sweltering heat of Summer day.

幾次下來學了個教訓，每次只能看一個醫生。坐著硬板凳一等就是幾小時，炎炎暑夏自然不用提。

All seems well with our patient except rashes everywhere on her bosom, back, feet, chin and more. Doctor says this is just the beginning. Itching. She has moderate degree of diarrhea, which is normal with Iressa.

病人前胸後背，腳上，下巴都是紅疹子，醫生說這才是開始而已，疹子會越發越多。最近開始拉肚子，據說身體適應了標靶藥 Iressa，會漸漸恢復正常。

We're going to take a MRI this Sat. and Dr. Hsu (許秉權) will read the result next Monday the earliest. This is Eileen's first MRI, three months after brain surgery. Many "what ifs" bubble in our brains. Anxiety built up is for sure. Please remember us in your prayer.

開腦手術快三個月了，週六下午要去照核磁共振。許大夫最早會在下週一通知我們結果。不知會是甚麼樣的情況，難免會緊張一番。請在禱告裡紀念我們。